part 2

after having a cry and a "why, God?" session, i tried to settle down on the couch to watch the gladiator - great movie, but just couldnt do it.  i turned off the tv and instead started to read 1000 gifts.  she has been talking about hardship and grief in this chapter.  She references Deut 32:39 and it has been salve on my heart today.. "See now that I, I am He, and there is no god besides Me; It is I who put to death and give life.  I have wounded and it is I who heal"  
She later references part of Lamentations 3:33.  I wanted to read the whole verse and ended up reading the whole chapter.  The first part of the chapter Jeremiah is complaining that the Lord has shut him down and is not even hearing his prayers, but in vs 11, he says,"He has turned me off my ways and pulled me in pieces; He has made me desolate."  Jesus has taken him (me) off his intended path and broken him (me) down to see that he (I) is nothing without Jesus.  Because we are so stubborn, we have to be desolate before we can recognize our need.  Verses 12 & 13 say: He has bent His bow and set me as a mark for the arrow.  He has caused the arrows of His quiver to enter into my heart.  God has a plan for me!  He wants His will to become my own - to replace the thoughts, desires and plans that are in my heart with His!  They are infinitely better, even if painful to start.  Verses 21 - 23: But this I recall and therefore have I hope and expectation: It is because of the Lord's mercy and loving kindness that we are not consumed, because His tender compassions fail not.  They are new every morning; great and abundant is Your stability and faithfulness.  (Thank Goodness!)  I just need to remember these next verses. 24 - 33: The Lord is my portion or share, says my living being; therefore will I hope in His and wait expectantly for Him.  The Lord is good to those who wait hopefully and expectantly for Him, to those who seek Him.  It is good that one should hope in and wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.  It is good for a man that he should bear the yoke in his youth.  Let him sit alone uncomplaining and keeping silent (in hope), because God has laid the yoke upon him.  Let him put his mouth in the dust - there may yet be hope.  Let him give his cheek to the one who smites him; let him be filled with reproach.  For the Lord will not cast off forever!  But though He causes grief, yet will He be moved to compassion according to the multitude of His loving kindness and tender mercy.  For He does not willingly and from His heart afflict or grieve the children of men.
Thank you, Jesus, that you are faithful and that you have amazing things planned out for my life!