These past few weeks have been hard for me as I see other families move forward in their adoption process.. I have been struggling to remember that they are ahead of me, started sooner and thus will get to the different milestones sooner. I am learning, very slowly, that it does me no good to compare what is happening to me against other people. God does things differently each time. After all, it is HIS plan and timing.
So, to pass the time I have been reading blogs, sorting through Naomi's things and looking at sewing patterns. I read a blog to eman the other day that was talking about how to respond to people when they have questions about your children and the circumstances that surround their adoption. I have had opportunity to talk about this article with another adopting mom, be the person to ask the stupid question and have people ask me the questions. The author of the blog was making the point of answering questions in such a way as to bring a positive, loving light on adoption. To use it as an opportunity to educate and advocate, to speak to these people who most likely are not trying to be rude (they just don't know better) with a tone of love since they are probably asking in front of your children.
As I said before, I have already been asked questions about Naomi. People in my community, especially at church, have been around enough adopting families to know that there are usually special needs attached to the kids. I have had several people ask what Naomi's need is. The first time I answered, of course she has SN! She is an orphan! This didn't suffice and the woman persisted. I did end up telling her what was going on with Naomi. I haven't decided what I plan to say to people, but it will be obvious that Naomi will look different. She has a big head and it will be several years until her body catches up. I hope that people wont be cruel in their comments, but I am expecting something. I want to say that I will be able to take them with grace and will try to follow in this woman's footsteps, but I cannot guarantee that. I pray that the Lord will give me the strength, wisdom and grace to advocate for my little girl and the rest of the orphans in the world.
I have one measurement of Naomi's head and have compared it to the boys. She has a big head. According to the information given, her head is the size of a 7 or 8 year old. Her body is the size of a one year old. I am amazed that her neck is strong enough to hold her head up! As I was going through the info I have, I realized that I am eligible for an update through our agency. So, I have emailed and asked. They told me they would ask. I am asking for updated measurements among other things. I am really interested in how her head will compare. I am hoping that the number will either be the same or less - not more. If they are more, then that would make me think her shunt is not working properly, which of course would be not so good.. I have not actually talked to a neurologist, instead taking the info I have been given on faith. I am also asking for any of Naomi's medical files, ct scans, etc. These would be very helpful in knowing what is going on inside her head.
I am really hoping for a few more pictures, too... I will add her new numbers to our measuring stick. May as well start keeping track of her too, like I do with the boys. I cant wait to stand her up there for real!
Sit tight my love. We will be there before the year is up, most likely sooner than that! I cannot wait to snuggle your little neck, kiss your sweet lips and cheeks. I love you, Naomi, my sweet delight! I will always protect and advocate for you! You are my daughter and I will fight for you just as fiercely as I do for your brothers!
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